Life Paralysis & How to Stop What's Holding You Back

By: Veronica Rushton

IG: @love_veronicaxo

“I don’t have enough time.” “I’m too busy.” “I can’t focus on that right now.” These are just a few of the excuses I have made when it comes following through with any personal goals I set. Before the new year, like every year, I set a list of goals and felt ready to tackle the next 365 days. That excitement soon died down and I fell into a place where I felt stuck. I know, it’s only been a few days and I have 11 months to conquer, but I often find myself in this cycle.

Last year, I finished a book called The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown (she has since been on my list of favorite authors). Her book takes you through 10 guideposts, that she has thoroughly researched, and connects them to living a wholehearted life and I read one each day. While reading through Guidepost #2: Cultivating Self-Compassion, I stopped on a term that I have never heard of before:

Life-paralysis:

refers to all of the opportunities we miss because we’re too afraid to put anything out in the world that could be imperfect. It’s also all the dreams that we don’t follow because of our deep fear of failing, making mistakes, and disappointing others. 

-Brené Brown

When I was reading this part of the chapter I felt like it had been placed in there just for me. Although I knew that this was an issue for me I didn’t want it to be an issue in 2018.

This chapter of the book made me open my eyes to what was really keeping me from blogging, my fear of failing. Whenever I blog I feel vulnerable because I’m creating content for everyone to see and not just myself. Because I’m creating content that is on the internet, I want everything to be perfect. I’ve always had this fear of failing and making mistakes, but what’s life without failure and mistakes?

Mistakes are inevitable. Even though no one enjoys the feeling of embarrassment, life will continue to put you in uncomfortable situations because that’s how you grow. Your comfort zone might be nice and cozy, but for growth, you will have to leave that zone. I realized that my comfort zone was keeping my content to myself. No one is going to see it, so no one can judge the imperfections. I felt comfortable knowing that no one could see my grammatical errors (still working my grammar) or know my opinions, but it wasn’t getting me anywhere. Eventually, I decided that for my blog to grow and for me to grow as a person I’m going to have to put myself out there.

This goes for everyone. Don’t let the feeling of not doing/being good enough in what you do stop you. Take the lessons from every mistake and run with them. They are there to help your growth not stifle it. Take that next step in whatever you’re trying to achieve, even if you look crazy doing it. It’s a new year and a fresh start. You’ve made it this far in whatever journey you’re on. If there is something you want to start or get back to, but you’re afraid just know that that feeling is normal. Don’t hold yourself back this year.

Here is a journal topic

What is that one thing you want to do? What is holding you back? Why?